Tuesday, January 28, 2014

6 Types of People in the Workplace

“Normal is getting dressed in clothes that you buy for work and driving through traffic in a car that you are still paying for - in order to get to the job you need to pay for the clothes and the car, and the house you leave vacant all day so you can afford to live in it.”
― Ellen Goodman

I haven't worked at many places, but through my experience and from some of the discussions my husband and I have there is a workplace dynamic that encompasses each person's motivation, habits, and personality. I decided to sit down and put pen to paper and came up with 6 workplace personalities. 

  1. The 30 Minute Worker: This person comes in early, doesn't really do much work during work hours aside from 30 mins here and there, and leaves later than everyone else to make the impression that they are hard at work. This person usually takes a lot of breaks to smoke, socialize, or grab a refreshment. They're lazy, often call for redundant meetings, and are always irritated if lunch will be late. It's a Snicker's commercial if you make this guy delay his lunch break. This guy believes in "fake it till you make it". Remember; there are no shortcuts to success. 
  2. The 9-5'er: This person generally gives 0 fucks on any given day. They're there to get their tasks done, collect their paycheck and go home to their personal life. They're usually social butterflies and have no real ambition to move up. This person doesn't care to meet any new goals other than getting to Friday. He/she usually uses up all sick/personal/vacation days before the year end. They work hard enough to get by but generally don't go above and beyond for the company. They might often make mistakes, and be seen as unreliable. Got something you need her to check out on Friday night before something gets deployed in the system? Sorry, she left her work laptop at the office, or is unreachable, and won't respond to your emails.  
  3. The Avoider: This is a person who really works hard, a workaholic if you may, but he/she isn't motivated by what chances there may be to move up the corporate ladder. This person is always plugged in and almost always willing to do your share of work. They stay late and work. Work is the scapegoat for something this person is avoiding. This is the person who volunteers to stay late despite having a family at home, and doesn't have a problem with the  projects piling up as long as you leave him/her to the peace and quiet of their cubicle to do their work. People like this usually have high stress environments at home or in their personal life and avoid all conflicts. They rather do the work for you instead of train you. 
  4. The Misguided Dreamer: this person is trying to find their way in the corporate world. They keep going back to school in hopes of "making it big time", driven not by ambition but by $ cash money $! The American dream has never been more out of reach to this person as they spend all their efforts and money furthering their education, and sinking into debt, rather than applying that education in the real world and standing apart from their peers. This person's certifications is impressive on paper but the lack of  well-rounded experience is apparent. This is a double edged sword. You need the piece of paper to get your foot in the door but it will only take you so far. Higher education is great, don't get me wrong, but why are you pursing it? To be an expert in your field or because it will take you to the next level, qualifying you for the next tax bracket?
  5. The Know it All: this individual can't effectively communicate with others without being annoying and acts aggressively superior. This person is the snitch when shit hits the fan, the person who is quick to point fingers when things go wrong, and feels that their ideas and beliefs are the only way, you cannot persuade this person to think outside of the box. They insist they're way of tackling a hard and newer project is the best way. They don't like learning newer technologies and resist change in the work environment. If it ain't broke why fix it? They genuinely want to be friends with their co-workers, but they can't help themselves from acting bossy. This person is motivated by power. 
  6. The Alpha: This is the ideal employee every company wants to have. They're fresh with innovative ideas all the time, a gem to work with, reliable, meets all deadlines or finishes work ahead of time. They're not afraid to assert themselves or speak up. They find themselves involved in majority of projects, and lead all discussions in meetings. This wizard is usually the go-to person to fix something when you don't want your boss to know you screwed something up. Everyone secretly envies this person's tenacity and leadership skills, and some will be stupid enough to try to discredit this person's work. The alpha is the alpha because he or she thoroughly finds passion in what he/she does, they genuinely care to raise company quotas, to earn recognition for hard work, and to recreate themselves in each days challenges. More importantly it's never been about the money, it's about personal growth and ambition. In this role, your contribution to your team will not be undervalued if you are not the leader, you still give your best in the roles you take, and hold yourself accountable for problems that may arise. 
What can we learn from this?  What's your motive? 

It truly doesn't matter which person you are in this typology, or if you fit the bill at all. Question your position and ask yourself what am I working for, other than the obvious reasons like to put food on the table. Are you happy or are you comfortable? You can't be the 30 min'er or the 9-5'er wondering why you're getting passed up for managerial positions. Likewise you can't be pursing a lifestyle that your efforts and talents don't match up to, but of course proceed anyway. We're just part of an "entitled" generation and I get it, but how's that working for you? Check this widely used test out and see what your personality type is: Jung-Myers-Briggs Personality Assessment

In depth description and careers that fit your assessment can be found here: Type Descriptions and Careers

Thursday, January 16, 2014

Do You Buy or Eat Tyson Foods? The Walmart Meat Supplier

I normally don't go to the extent of telling readers to boycott any particular brand. I'm not paid for my opinions or my posts on things I've reviewed. However, I do get paid for advertisements on my page but again, not for my content. This is the most cruel thing I've ever seen done to animals. Please watch this video and boycott Tyson Foods. Its a long shot to ask people to give up eating pork, but please look into where your food is coming from and go the humane way to say the least. Even if they decide to clean up their act I would never trust a company that has a history of such horrifying acts.


And yes, I'm a bit of a tree-hugger...

Wednesday, January 15, 2014

As Honest As I'll Ever Be Pt. 1

I think no matter how many dreams you make come true, there is, nor will there ever be; Perfection. Its unattainable, yet we strive for it anyway. Nobody's life is perfect despite how it looks on the outside. We're all struggling with something, fighting battles and living with fears nobody knows about. We stress big and small things, lash out, overreact, and let anger get the best of us sometimes. Somehow being human got confused with feigning perfection, as people conceal their flaws and presumptuously flaunt their perfect lives. However, it's how we surpass our obstacles and continue smiling, laughing and embracing happiness that we live a full life. I'm not saying we should run out into the streets and spill our guts to every person that walks by, but we shouldn't feign perfection either. It's self-serving.

I spent a great part of 2013 trying to find a balance between fitness goals, motherhood, learning different things, growing spiritually, reading as much as I could, experimenting with life essentially. I learned to love myself in the past 4 years more than anything else. Though I love myself, I realized the deep appreciation I didn't have before when I was the most critical to myself yet at my most beautiful. I'm currently farthest from my fitness goals and in retrospect it's my own fault. I didn't love myself enough before to appreciate what I had. I was on a diet my entire life, as a child, as a teen, as an adult.

The thyroid controls not only metabolism but hormones as well.We learn that years of yo-yo dieting can be damaging to your body and metabolism, but who gives a shit when you have a dress you want to fit into, when you have negative self talk consistently pushing you, standards society subliminally planted in our minds of the ideology of beauty that bombards us daily, and the judgement of family and friends who are first and foremost quick to give you advice you didn't ask for. That damage can't happen to me right?  Just because I don't use a blade to cut myself, doesn't mean I'm not cutting myself daily with my thoughts, with critical self-talk. As I grew a deep appreciation for my body after creating two beautiful babies, two things that didn't stop despite a greater sense of confidence and self-esteem were:

  • Yo-yo dieting habits- what is eating normal anymore? I'm not even sure.  
  • The "Never Good Enough" syndrome of daily negative self-talk that fuels further trials and failures of diets and exercise to improve oneself
What caused me to realize this? 

  • Hair Loss and hormonal imbalances. 
I said I would reveal all this after I came up with a solution, and when I felt ready. The truth is we're never ready, and I'm not entirely sure I will find a solution. After I stopped breastfeeding my 2nd daughter exclusively for 6 mos in 2012 (while not taking prenatal vitamins and still trying to lose the baby weight), I experienced an explosion of hormonal problems. My face was taken over with cystic acne which took 3 mos to clear up, and 1 month of birth control. After that my hair started falling steadily since Dec 2012. In the last year I've lost more than half of my hair. You would never know thanks to my curly locks and styling products. I've been to Drs, got every panel of bloodwork done that they could think of, seen the dermatologist and there's no solution. Everything has come back normal. 

Before and After Washing Hair May 2013
If you've never lost your hair you don't know the desperation and devastation that comes with it. It's absolutely the most depressing thing to ever happen to a woman and I don't wish it on anyone. The only thing that my doctor explained is that "hair is an internal thing, if you're stressed, if your hormones are out of wack, or if you're dieting and exercising too much, you will continue to lose your hair." She suggested prenatal vitamins and rogaine, that the answer is not in a shampoo. Maybe it's postpartum related even she said. Well fuck me, because my baby is two years old and I think I'm beyond being "postpartum". I do experience a lot of stress at times and I'm always trying to lose a better part of 20 lbs my whole life as my Junior High School time capsule revealed a few months ago. As handfuls of hair fell out I would compulsively count strands last year, researching how much was normal and how much was abnormal. I would change shampoos, each of them varying in the amount of hair that fell, then looking in the mirror of my just washed and dripping hair and have a full blown panic attack at the sight of how much of my scalp was peeping through my wet hair. God bless my sweet husband who would put me in a tight bear hug and tell me I'm beautiful and he loves me even without my hair and that everything would be okay. He knew what I was going through, it's all I obsessed about. I miss feeling free to color my hair. I haven't colored my hair since April 2012, I miss straightening my hair, I never do it anymore because it's far too thin to look decent, it always pastes to my head.  A short hair cut will only make me look older something I learned to feel that isn't what a 28 year old should ever encourage. 

So what will I do? 

Well I stopped having panic attacks that's for one. How? I came up with a solution that I made peace with. If I can't find a solution to regrow my hair, or at least stop the falling, I will shave my head and wear wigs. Pretty simple yet radical, because that's what I am; radical. That's the only way to be in control of this situation, I fully understand why cancer patients do it. I pray, I read, I grow. I grow a deeper appreciation for the here and now and enjoy "what is". I will continue trying to be positive, and fabulous through it. I am still trying new things on a holistic approach and I truly BELIEVE with ever fiber of my being that I will surpass this obstacle like every other one I have in the past. I will keep trying, aspiring, and searching for something that works for me. With each day's struggle to remain focused, positive, and joyful for every dream that came true for us, I tell myself: You are that same beautiful girl you used to be, -20 lbs or not. I am no longer self-inflicting emotionally. 

As usual, I keep it real and will let you know what happens next...Just remember: There's no such thing as Perfect. “Serenity comes when you trade expectations for acceptance.” -Unknown

Thursday, January 9, 2014

10 Healthy Changes you Should Make in 2014

I resolved to making resolutions for this year but for some reason I grew to hate the whole "New Year's Resolutions" cliché. Instead I came up with things I want to change for mind, body, and soul health, and I'd like to call them my "Healthy Changes for 2014".

  1. Change all pots and pans to "cast iron, enamel-coated cast iron, or stainless steel". The Teflon on non-stick pans are detrimental to your health. It's mainly cancerous. I mean what's the point of eating your vegetables to stay healthy if chemicals have leached into them and everything else you cook? I don't know.... It's like if I'm gonna try to eat organic I might as well get some new pots and pans too right? Be sensible about what's in your control and what's not regarding your health. 
  2. I want to start my own organic garden! I don't know when or how but I better do my homework from now until April if I want to get this going for the spring. This will serve as practice for my long term goal of opening up my own organic dairy farm. I have no idea how urban farming works but it's a industry that needs more attention and growth for greater sustainability and power over our current tainted food system. 
  3. Our next big investment needs to be a water filtration system for the pipes. FL water is hard as fuck. It's full of crap that disrupts your endocrine system. The skin is the largest organ, it immediately absorbs all the crap you put on it including chlorinated water, and  that leaves the kidneys and liver to filter the junk out. Sure it's a hefty price to pay in the thousands range but so worth it. Don't believe me? Call up one of those companies and ask for the demonstration. You will want to steal the small filter they bring, to wash your hands in that water that comes from it ALL Day, no exaggeration, I promise! If I can't get the one I want, then I'll just have to settle with one we can install by ourselves.
  4. Avoid toxic people. It's not necessarily just the people who talk crap to you, but the people who bring out the worst in you. The bullshitters who think you're stupid enough to believe their crap, the people who ruminate about the same problems daily, the people who irk you in some way that causes your brain to spit out negative thoughts.  Keep anger, resentment, and even jealousy at bay. 
  5. Avoid rumination yourself. It was listed as one of the top 10 things miserable people do which gets them stuck in the past. Moving on is hard when you're pissed. When I'm pissed I lose control. I've worked hard on controlling my thoughts and feelings for the past 3 years, I only want for good thoughts, good vibrations, and positive energy in my life. If you like to dwell on a problem and talk about the same damn thing over and over here's a solution: Write a journal or call someone and vent it out quick and never speak about it again. However, avoid calling the person who will keep bringing it up. I usually get pissed at my husband and I just get it out right then and there, take a deep breath, then calmly both sides take turns talking out grievances. We come to a resolution, we apologize to each other, and it's over. No need to bring it up again unless there is a 2nd offense and no need to bitch and complain about the same damn thing for the next 3 days. Last week, I found myself ruminating and I need to get it together fast.
  6. I'd like to find a holistic Dr. that is covered by our insurance for our family, especially the girls. It might be like trying to find a needle in a haystack but there has to be a conventional doctor out there that practices both western and alternative medicine. I've been disappointed by doctors, and find that thorough research of my own helped me more than anything else, it would just be nice to get my money's worth when we go see the Dr. 
  7. Start eating only grass-fed meat/dairy/butter. I'm currently doing research on this topic which I will share my results to an issue I've been struggling with. To just cry out and say this is my problem; blah blah, blah doesn't make sense and serves as only rumination. I'm trying to find a solution before I delve out the details so others can benefit from it. 
  8. I want to finally invest in a bread machine to make my own bread. Yea I know it's not that expensive for a bread machine but I want a really good one and I wanted to make sure it's worth the cost. I've been efficiently making my own bread since July 2013, and it would be a whole lot easier and faster if I had a machine to do the work. If you're not sure why I don't just buy bread click here to find out why you shouldn't eat store bread. 
  9. Get outdoors more, it's healthier than being locked up inside. This will be hard for me, we usually do afternoon walks with the kids when the weather permits, but to be honest I hate the outdoors for the bugs, the heat/humidity,  and the sun is intense out here. Sure I go outside to take my kid to school and back, but I'm not outside long enough to absorb the sunlight and vitamin D. Lack of vitamin D is linked to many diseases. 
  10. Work towards a worthy cause.  I want to volunteer or make an effort towards something bigger than myself. I don't know what or how, but I'm tired of hearing about disgusting organizations like the Red Cross scamming people and not using majority of the money towards relief efforts. Before we were parents we participated in three annual Relay for Life events, but fell off as we became busier with our family. 

If there's anything I want to keep doing, it's to keep dreaming. Literally. I have been a dreamer/idealist from the very beginning when I was too young and inexperienced to know that it would eventually lead me to scramble in the dark by myself, but I continued to dream anyway. When I think about all the times I was disappointed and depressed, I could sit and dwell in a stew of bitterness and false ego, or I can live in gratitude and think of all the times negative turned into positive.

Sunday, January 5, 2014

The Month of Motivation

Happy New Year Everyone!!! Everyday is a struggle to remain positive, but more so coming back from my trip than it was before. 2013 was a great year filled of positive outcomes and positive affirmations, and overcoming the negative. I'm not gonna bore you with the new year new me bullshit everyone posts. The holiday went by so quickly. I thoroughly enjoyed my trip to NYC but plans didn't go without the added stress as usual. What can I say? Drama calls my name. I don't recommend ever going on a vacation longer than 5-7 days even if it's your hometown, even if you're visiting family you haven't seen in forever. I got homesick on the first day and then again by the 5th day. I was there for 11.5 days! It's nuts! I enjoyed having the help of family to take care of the girls and watching them while I gallivanted all over the place at all hours of the day and night. We recently lost our sitter who had a baby of her own, so I'll be looking for someone which will take a while again.

If you do visit New York I highly recommend going to Melody Hookah Lounge in Astoria. I had a blast! The music was great; they played Arabic, House, Techno, Top 40, Rap, Hip Hop, Reggaeton, Latin, etc., and the appetizers and drinks were awesome. They also had a belly-dancer who was pretty good too. The dance floor was kinda small, but overall it was a great night. I let myself drink, smoke, and dance without a care in the world. My husband and I fought like old people about going out to the nightclubs in the first place, but I wasn't having that. If he didn't want to go I was still going to get out there and let loose on my own.. Eventually he caved even though clubs aren't his scene and I learned something about myself when I was there. If I become resentful or angry enough I could very well lead to my own self-destruction. A dark hostility took over me, I felt trapped by something invisible bounding me to be just mother and wife, and I rebelled as I did when I was a teenager. I found myself still fighting for my own sense of individuality and it's crazy that I experienced that at this point of my life. If the opportunity had presented itself at the time to escape, to fuck up, to go wild with abandon I would've done it. The feelings pass but that was the true moment I realized why I don't currently live in NY and why FL kept me grounded as it does most people.

This is my life. 
The culture of NYC as the city that never sleeps can easily cause people like me with an addictive, impulsive personality to easily fall off track. Being born and raised there I never felt bound to any rules, and went with the flow. Moving to FL when I was 18, sort of made me soft. I worried about things, I lived under a rock and I essentially became a different person. When I visited this time, I lost my inhibitions, I lost my worries and just lived for the moment when I was out and about. During the day I would get bored and miss home for the privacy of sitting alone with my own thoughts and feelings but by night I was a bird; energetic and willing to go anywhere and do anything. Being free-spirited has always been me, I hate being tied down. I took the train, the bus, walked, went to Long Island City, Times Square, Rockefeller, Ice Skating in Bryant Park, shopping at Queens Center Mall, had a girls day with two of my closest friends, caught a movie, refused to make time for anyone I didn't speak to regularly, and this time I had such a different appreciation for all of it. I missed the city experience but hated it at the same time. I was a tourist for the first time in my home state.  Now I'm officially a Floridian. I observed so much, and found gratitude for the opportunity to experience both ways of life. If you're not careful though, some of the inevitable negativity crawls up into you from being in that aggressive environment for too long.

I'm going to continue striving for a magical and blessed year. As 50 says; "Turn shit into sugar". Keep praying and believing in something greater than anything you've ever imagined. Since January is the month for sparking all sorts of motivation check this out, you'll love it; 37 Things You'll Regret When You're Old. Be Ahead of the Game.

I did all of this in 2013 and hope to do even more of it in 2014! You all should too!