Friday, August 21, 2015

The Evolution of A Woman

The other night it's like 2 am and I can't seem to shut my mind off. A lot of things are going on in terms of upcoming events I just can't seem to understand how the summer ended so quickly. I was like going through item after item at a time like a never ending grocery list of to dos, and questions, and basically this entire conversation with myself, that I came to the conclusion that being a woman is quite exhausting. Last November I questioned: Are the Glory Days Over?

Nine months later... I still stand firm that the "Glory Days" are far from over. They are over if you let them be over. If you feel old, you will act old. If you act old, you become old. It's that simple.  My friends and I were having this whole discussion about our style, and how heels aren't as tolerable as they used to be, drinking isn't what it used to be, eating carbs isn't what it used to be. It's true. Things happen, bodies change, and old age creeps in. Random aches and pains will have you trading in late nights for early bedtimes and that's just the reality of it, and you better get to bed if you want to keep up with the excited vibrant woman you know you are deep down inside. The moment you trade in sexy for comfort, it's downhill. You think you're evolving but you're not, because the first thing women who've adopted this trade-off do is justify the trade-off and then hate, blame, and complain. Some justifications are; "I don't need a man, I'm already in a relationship." Or "I don't have anybody to impress." Yet these women will secretly hate the women who still "got it".

They get caught up, and follow everything about celebrities, and forget that they have the same potential, and their own very unique persona to grow. Why do I need to keep up with Kim K and others, if I'm doing Michelle really well?  If you never cared for personal style then power to you. I'm not talking about the women who are already comfortable in their own skin and feel vibrant as they did when they were teenagers and early 20s. This is for the women who feel like they've lost the electricity in them. That current you feel inside at your best self, in your best dress, in your best hair and your best shoes.

At the other end of the spectrum there are the women who haven't quite lost their outer sparkle, but these "divas" don't evolve outside of their high maintenance, princess complex. They never step out of their comfort zone, they think everything revolves around them, everything should be convenient to them, need to be pampered all the time by people around them, they feel they have the right to talk down to and about others never self-aware enough to pay attention to their own inadequacies. Even ones without a princess complex; they are horrible friends, they are unable to be nurturing, they make poor choices, are flaky, unreliable, poor in their relationships, they don't stand strong for any cause, or live based on any principles. A true princess is anything but spoiled, entitled, or one dimensional and is aware of the things around her bigger than herself.
"A woman must constantly be evolving. She must constantly reinvent herself, both inside and out. "    
-Michelle M-Singh 
I'm always in the process of reinventing myself. I thrive off of learning and growing. Contrary to what you've heard, it's really okay to be neurotic to a degree, awareness requires it, but like everything in life, moderation is the key. Discovering things about myself that I never knew is all apart of the process. Testing and pushing limits, questioning myself, and realizing that it's okay to be multifaceted in a world that hates complicated. I act boldly and bravely even when I'm scared. I'm a free spirited person, and while I'm busy trying to enjoy the now and live in one moment at a time, most times I feel suffocated by responsibilities and pressures or scared for what's next, all self implied of course. Inside me there's fucking chaos. There's a million different things on my brain from drives, desires, goals, ideas, conflicts, to do lists, things to remember, people to remember, plans to make, plans to put into actions, praying to do, positive inner self-talk to be reinforced, routines to tweak, books to read, exercise I need, in addition to all the daily living chores, caring for children and personal upkeep, sleep, and unwinding to do. Being exhausted and needing more than the average hrs of sleep is part of both the problem and the solution. In the eyes of others, I'm just a stay at home mom. In my own mind, I am wife, mom, friend, sister, daughter, counselor, life coach, influencer, writer, nutritionist, health nut, hypochondriac, revolutionist, crazy individual, ...HUMAN.

 As women, we transform in four phases from the playful child, to the sexy seductress, to the good mother, and finally to the wise older woman. What we forget in the hardest phase of being a good mother is the playful child and the sexy seductress... exuberant, carefree, fun, wild, adventurous, rebellious, and let's not forget the beauty and passion that exudes from such a woman so vibrant. From the moment I became pregnant I knew things would change. I feared that change, but I was determined to have it all and that the one thing that wouldn't and hasn't changed is that I'm still the same girl I've always been. A free spirit... I've taken a little banging here and there but I'm still gonna strive to encompass all four phases as I grow older. My purpose is even clearer as I think of every person I've talked to or have associated with in the last seven-ten years. I'm a catalyst. I will touch you and change you in ways you've never imagined. If you know me personally or as an acquaintance, ask yourself how have I made an impact in your life? If I haven't, one day I will, or maybe you just don't realize it yet. I'm that little voice, bringing awareness to all the things you've been ignoring. Presumptuous I bet, but it's true.

"It's both a beautiful blessing and curse to be born woman. Step up to the plate and give it your all." 
 -Michelle M-Singh 

 They say a woman's work is never done. It really isn't... so when you're not busy leaving your prints however small they may seem, know that these tiny specks shape the world and it's okay to break the rules and switch up your priorities sometimes:

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